Making lists…

So last night I made a list of things to do today. I started the day out earlier than usual. I woke up and headed out the door within 15 minutes. Got home a little over an hour later. Showered. Listened to a couple of training videos online. That was one thing on my list.

After that I went for a walk to the neighborhood donut shop. Came back home and then left again to go to the bank to cash a check. Not too long after returning home I took a nap for about an hour and a half (the first nap I’ve had in over a week.). When I woke up I went to the grocery store and Staples. While the trip to Staples was not on the list of things to do, it was something I needed to do for a project I am doing.

Upon returning home I applied for two jobs. I had declared 3+ jobs applied for today.

So, after all of that, I did 1 and 3/4’s of a thing on my to do list. I know the entire day wasn’t a waste. After all I did get groceries and the supplies I need for a project. Ooo, and some business cards. 🙂 But I didn’t do the big stuff on my list. I had even made a declaration to call 2 people for my nutrition business. I didn’t do that, either.

I’m not totally sure what to think of the results from today. From my declarations (my list) I did not have many results at all. I did create results in other areas. I don’t want to discount those things. I also want to look at why I didn’t keep my commitment to myself about the other things on my list. I know I can renegotiate things with myself. But I didn’t even think to do that. Maybe I felt like I was being busy so I was actually accomplishing something. If that’s the case, then I get to shift my understanding of what success is. Busyness is not making progress. It’s just a lot of energy spread all out. I think it’s time that I learn to focus my energy in one area (or just a few) at a time. Being a woman, I can multi task pretty well. But when I get distracted from the commitments I have with the busyness in other areas (areas that are noble and good) I fall through with my commitments to myself and others.

I attended a workshop last February that was based on the Samurai’s code. One thing about Samurai is that they were committed to something greater than themselves. I get to be committed to my commitments because of the greater impact keeping my word has on myself and especially those around me. Even when I have only made a commitment to myself and I break that commitment, I believe it still affects the people around me. I know that I’ve broken my word with myself and my mood changes with others. It’s subtle, but it can really negatively impact a relationship.

As someone said today in a post on a business page today, I get to stop being hard on myself when I don’t follow through on things. I agree. I also get to get underneath why I keep putting stuff off. Because if I don’t know what triggers it and become aware of when I am experiencing those same emotions, it is going to keep happening.

How do you deal with not following through with things? Have you had a similar experience? Did you break up your pattern? And if you did, how did you do it?


About flower

Originally from Michigan. Live in the Los Angeles area now. Love it. I also love animals. :)
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