So last night I made a list of things to do today. I started the day out earlier than usual. I woke up and headed out the door within 15 minutes. Got home a little over an hour later. Showered. Listened to a couple of training videos online. That was one thing on my list.
After that I went for a walk to the neighborhood donut shop. Came back home and then left again to go to the bank to cash a check. Not too long after returning home I took a nap for about an hour and a half (the first nap I’ve had in over a week.). When I woke up I went to the grocery store and Staples. While the trip to Staples was not on the list of things to do, it was something I needed to do for a project I am doing.
Upon returning home I applied for two jobs. I had declared 3+ jobs applied for today.
So, after all of that, I did 1 and 3/4’s of a thing on my to do list. I know the entire day wasn’t a waste. After all I did get groceries and the supplies I need for a project. Ooo, and some business cards. 🙂 But I didn’t do the big stuff on my list. I had even made a declaration to call 2 people for my nutrition business. I didn’t do that, either.
I’m not totally sure what to think of the results from today. From my declarations (my list) I did not have many results at all. I did create results in other areas. I don’t want to discount those things. I also want to look at why I didn’t keep my commitment to myself about the other things on my list. I know I can renegotiate things with myself. But I didn’t even think to do that. Maybe I felt like I was being busy so I was actually accomplishing something. If that’s the case, then I get to shift my understanding of what success is. Busyness is not making progress. It’s just a lot of energy spread all out. I think it’s time that I learn to focus my energy in one area (or just a few) at a time. Being a woman, I can multi task pretty well. But when I get distracted from the commitments I have with the busyness in other areas (areas that are noble and good) I fall through with my commitments to myself and others.
I attended a workshop last February that was based on the Samurai’s code. One thing about Samurai is that they were committed to something greater than themselves. I get to be committed to my commitments because of the greater impact keeping my word has on myself and especially those around me. Even when I have only made a commitment to myself and I break that commitment, I believe it still affects the people around me. I know that I’ve broken my word with myself and my mood changes with others. It’s subtle, but it can really negatively impact a relationship.
As someone said today in a post on a business page today, I get to stop being hard on myself when I don’t follow through on things. I agree. I also get to get underneath why I keep putting stuff off. Because if I don’t know what triggers it and become aware of when I am experiencing those same emotions, it is going to keep happening.
How do you deal with not following through with things? Have you had a similar experience? Did you break up your pattern? And if you did, how did you do it?
My Journey Through Life 